Life is easy...

... until you let emotions get involved.

If you're reading this, I guess you chose to given I decided against sharing it like I usually do.

So I've had a pretty weird week to reflect on. I caught up with a couple of people I haven't seen in a long time, had a pretty significant achievement to note which I'll go into at a later date. It's been rounded off with one of my favourite films; Hitch. Naturally sooner or later I ended up thinking about far too much and it culminated in a plethora of thoughts that I'll express here.

When I was younger, a good friend of mine introduced me to a community, a philosophy and a structure relating to social interaction and how we develop friendships, relationships and whatever else we want from those around us, or indeed those we want around us.

At first, it was a revelation. Like anything with a multitude of levels, I took an interest in it and put the theories into practice. In honesty, I achieved more than I could have ever have expected and thought I'd found a place in which I was incredibly happy - my social circles grew, I was far more confident than I ever considered I could be and the only thing I wasn't content with, was my job.

Nine months down the line, I've found myself in a career that I'm passionate about with opportunities to progress moreso than I ever had previously. This week I was presented with the chance to step up to a consultant role in Chelmsford. It's my first real challenge, which will allow me to demonstrate my abilities and become a real reflection on what I've learnt and how to apply myself to my own desk. I'm incredibly confident, slightly anxious and beyond excited to get started at the earliest opportunity - there's work to be done and rewards to be had at the end of it.

So, with the job in line, being the only thing I wasn't entirely satisfied with, you could safely assume I'm on tip top form without a care in the world...

Unfortunately, circumstances change. With relevance to the title, on paper, everything is going well. Beneath the surface however; everything I studied, learnt, analysed and developed kind of fell apart. My social circles are still as they have been, I still meet new people on a regular basis, still have the same close friends I've always considered as such, but emotions certainly got in the way.

I've always been a firm believer in following your heart over your head. When it goes well, there's no better feeling; the euphoria is almost indescribable and despite the lows being almost unbearable at the worst of times; you struggle through them because you know coming out the other side is better than you've ever experienced before. Sometimes your head is frustrating to the point of telling you that everything isn't as it should be; or not quite what you want. Suddenly things aren't as simple as they should be because what you feel is clouding what you think. Perhaps however, it should be considered the other way round.

Back to Hitch, and a quote or two I want to end on..

"Because thats what people do... they leap and hope to God they can fly! Because otherwise, we just drop like a rock... wondering the whole way down..."why in the hell did I jump?" But here I am..."

Perhaps more relevantly?

"When you're wondering what to say or how you look, just remember, she's already out with you. That means she said yes when she could have said no. That means she made a plan when she could have just blown you off. So that means it's no longer your job to make her like you. It's your job not to mess it up."

Identifying your mistakes is the first step to rectifying them. How to do that exactly? Well, I'm working on it.

Inspiration

Those closest to me, and some of those a little further away could tell you a few key things about me.
    1. I'm terrible with money. The more I earn, the more ways I find to spend it unnecessarily.
    2. I like using fairly complicated words when occasion calls for it and I tend to develop insightful phrases at every given opportunity.
    3. I'm incredibly opinionated, expressive, challenging and generally unmanageable. Decidedly unapologetic too.

I touched on my last blog about having people in my life that I find inspirational and that I'm quite lucky in the sense that I have them in abundance. After a lengthy conversation with a friend of mine about her career prospects, ambitions and goals; I found myself immersed in the topic of inspiration and ultimately decided that I'd share my thoughts.

What does 'inspiration' mean to you?

As part of my developing role at work, the question was put to me; 'What are your ambitions, how much will they cost you and what will you do to succeed?', followed by a simple spreadsheet prompting a response to what I want to have and what I want to do. The general feedback I had from others that had completed the same spreadsheet was an uplift in motivation and a sudden passion to begin performing to their maximum potential. Money is obviously a significant motivator, but somehow, I don't think it had the desired affect when I sat down to consider the possibilities.

In turn, this made me consider what it is that drives people to get out of bed, to go to work, to envision their future and to consistently develop themselves as people in order to get where they want to be and own everything they've ever dreamed of. Perhaps in my opening paragraph I should have listed number 4 to highlight my cynicism, but in reality, I don't think the two are strictly hand in hand.

I find it hard to define myself between the boundaries of optimism, pessimism and realism. I think I'm guilty of falling into all three categories dependant on how I'm feeling and what it is I'm contemplating at the time. When it comes to ambition however, I very much think I fall into what I'd consider the middle category, realism. Truth is, I have no real drive to spend endless hours immersed in scenic locations or to be photographed next to historic landmarks. It doesn't mean they're not things I wouldn't enjoy, because undoubtedly I would - but naturally, I could live without them.

My short term goals predominantly focus on clearing my debt, somewhat minimal yet also needless. It only exists due to excessive expenditure and poor money management, so ultimately, I have to refocus my finances and learn to make better financial decisions. Decisions that I should really stick to, because I've created multiple spreadsheets tracking my out-goings, prioritising my payments and precisely where I should be distributing my income. Unfortunately I'm heading towards the age in which I should be suitably independent; I know this, and I've probably known it for a few years now, yet I've failed to acknowledge it.

Following that, I want to be in a position to buy myself a new car, overhaul my wardrobe (far too many Burton tags still in there for my liking) and then reconsider my options going forward. In truth, my long term ambitions are probably relatively straightforward; marriage, kids, a comfortable home in a good area and so on. If that makes me distinctly average? So be it. I don't think there's ever been a price on happiness.

To be inspired is great, to inspire is incredible

Referring back to the discussion that got me onto this trail of thought...

The friend in question is already in a stable, well paid career, a happy relationship and looking to buy her second home. She asked my opinion given my recent position in recruitment regarding a change of career, possibly as a 'career break' but essentially without sacrificing her current salary, with interests in management, law and teaching - three fields in which she has little experience of and no formal qualifications in. Typically, you'd assume the barriers to entry are far too prominent to overcome, but I think this can be challenged. We're fortunate enough to be in the midst of a technological era in which social networking opens opportunities that wouldn't be available to us even ten years ago, possibly less. "If opportunity doesn't come knocking, build a door" - this couldn't be any more relevant than it is today. We live in a world in which we have opportunities to contact people across the world in any given industry.

Following this, she also expressed an interest in psychotherapy and hypnotism, to which a course was available for a reasonable yet not excessive fee. Doing this would give the opportunity to work for herself, and realistically? The financial rewards are limitless. Again, social media and 'viral' internet material opens the world to a whole host of clientèle to work with to the extent that selling anything is far more possible than it ever has been. In closing, I left her with the same sentiment that I'll end this blog with:

If you're passionate about it, you'd be silly not to do it.

If you were to do it and fail, you can at least be proud for chasing your dreams.

If you never even started, you'll forever rue what could have been.

I know which option I'd rather not have to live with.

I hope if you've taken the time to read this you'll at least consider what inspires you and how far you can explore your own potential.