Checking in with reality..

So I'm writing this purely for my own benefit and I guess those that read it will be those that take time out themselves to check this blog rather than clicking on a FB / twitter link because they're bored..

After an incredibly productive day in taking third at the Southern Masters Paintball and settling for second at The George for a fiver short of first place; I took the time to reflect on the past few months. I made a passing comment to Rich along the lines of "I'm not quite sure where I've been going wrong recently.." then had one of those eureka moments where everything makes sense. Naturally, I figured this blog was the best place to get it off my chest.

I like to believe (and I'm sure I have critics on both sides) that I'm a pretty dab hand at giving advice across a wide variety of subjects; be it work, relationships, friendships, poker, paintball or those niggling life decisions that you need an external opinion on.. My problem with this..?

I've failed to take my own advice on more than one occasion. I've been in many situations recently in which i should've taken an objective view and discover the answers, but failed to do so and ultimately paid the price in one way or another.

Without being too specific; I've been far too content with being second best, a stop-gap or just a temporary fulfilment to people without really considering what's best for me in both the short and long term. I generally look to be the best I can be.. For someone else.

Selfless and egotistically satisfying? Maybe. But as it goes on; I've never really made it my priority to be honest with myself about what's best for me, and realistically, that's more important than anything else. I don't think it's wrong to "look out for number one" and infact, I think it's actually incredibly healthy.

When your expectations are high, you have to accept there will be several disappointments so you can really appreciate the penultimate taste of success. Besides; how can you determine what's truly the best thing for you if there aren't pitfalls on the way?

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

It's an ancient Chinese proverb that I'm sure the large majority of those reading this will have heard; yet I've only just come to truly understand it.

So my parting advice to anyone that reads this, and indeed myself?

Live life for yourself. Share it with those that don't take you for granted; but truly appreciate how fortunate they are to have you.